Now, I'm not one to talk about my personal life to the general public, but this is my blog, so I might as well just put myself out there anyway. I want to talk about my friendships, new and old. Let me start by sharing that I truly love all of my friends, no really, I legitimately love them, and it's not the "oh you've been my friend for x amount of years, and you deserve an I love you." I genuinely care for my friends in my life, and I'm not sure if it's because I have so little 'close' friends or if that's just how I am. I could go further, but I immensely care for these people.
Over the years in my young life I feel as if I've learned a lot about being a friend, or a best friend to someone, and I always ask myself if they really feel the same towards me. I over analyze it from time to time, and if I am honest I tend to look a tad deeper into the meaning everything in my life, I stress out about it a lot, and that is called... anxiety, what a party pooper. Anyways. As a friend I really feel like I can potentially be a pretty good one, it could be because I'm pretty selfless, I've learned heartbreak (romantically, and non-romantically), I have certainly learned the value of life (whether it was my own or someone else's), I feel like I can understand where someone else is coming from most of the time, I'm uncommonly patient. I don't know, but the reason why I'm making this post is because I had such an amazing time yesterday with FRIENDS, I literally cannot get the fuck over it.
So, my friend Aubrey and I made plans to go out and take photos, and can I just say that I have never felt so welcome as a person into someone's life. I mean at least it felt that way. We met up in U Village, and said hi to Sarina (who Aubrey has known for quite some time, and I've know her since the end of 14', but I love her!). Aubrey was, essentially, my personal tour guide, and she showed me around the University of Washington Campus, we took photos, and walked around the neighborhoods surrounding the school. we also went out to dinner in Ballard, which was a lot of fun, and I had one of the best burgers I've had in a long time. I really, really enjoyed her company, and honestly it was the best time I've had since my god damn wedding. I felt like I could be myself, take some pictures, talk about my personal life, which ahem doesn't happen very often with just anyone, and it was just super awesome.
I've also been waiting to see my friend Fischer. He's such an awesome guy, and one of the best people I can talk to about pretty much anything. Since I was in the surrounding downtown area I wanted to stop by and see him. It was super funny, cause I knew he was working, and I don't think that either of us anticipated me getting into downtown so quickly, so here I was just aimlessly driving around downtown Seattle waiting for him to get out of work. So many explicitives, and giggles were happening as I was driving around by myself. So, i pick him up, and first we try to find parking near his apartment, which in hindsight could have been a lot easier, but no. We catch up on our lives, laugh about stupid reality shows, and reminisce on the past. It was so nice just seeing a familiar face, and it felt like a little bit of home. So, thank you Fischer.
Yesterday was so perfect, because for me being so far from all of my friends in California is difficult. I miss all of them, and I wish I was in California to see their accomplishments. However, being with these amazing people yesterday really made me feel more grounded and whole. It was an amazing feeling not having to stress, and not having to worry about what the other person thinks of you. I really am so thankful for those moments that I could share with them, because saying that I have friends is not a very common thing to say for me, and I really struggle with calling people my friends, because like I said, I over analyze everything, so my mind always tells me that some friendships are only temporary. I'll keep fighting for some to be permanent though.
I look forward to more fun times, and just being better friends with Aubrey, Fischer, or whoever else. I hope making friends gets easier for me, and honestly I just have to find my kind of people, and just have fun being 'me' with them.
Have Love, AND FRIENDS!
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